audio by year '2006'

Episode 01

30:45 minutes (7.69 MB)

On her first day at the Mall of America, Rosemary tries lying and begging for shopping bags, to no avail. After a sushi lunch to regroup, she gets out her credit card and starts shopping. Goat milk soap, really expensive DKNY pajamas, and a Skwish toy for Lindsay’s baby get her warmed up for soul-searching visits to Coach and Osterman Jewelers. A giant cheerios pillow for the kids tops it off. Total spent: $425.53. Total returned: $383.14.

Episode 04

58:43 minutes (14.73 MB)

Rosemary’s husband refuses to open the credit card bill anymore, while Rosemary plots how to introduce her new purple satin Puma sneakers into the house without ever actually telling him that she bought them. Trying to overcome her weak will and stop buying things for herself, she delves into the “nosebleed section” of the 3rd level: Bead It!, Rybicki Cheese, and Al’s Farm Toys prove particularly challenging. Total spent: $446.57. Total returned: $417.96.

Episode 07

68:09 minutes (17.11 MB)

After a trip to the River Church to see what they’re up to, Rosemary buys her first pair of diamond earings, and then falls into a deep reverie regarding the meaning of the store name “White House/Black Market.” She falls in love for the first time at Local Charm. Total spent: $763.63. Total returned: $680.64.

Episode 08

41:35 minutes (10.48 MB)

Rosemary’s mom comes along for the ride, but ditches her as soon as they get to the Mall to go shopping for walking shoes. Even a black video ipod can’t get Rosemary going, as she resigns herself to one more boring day of shopping by herself. By the end of a very low-energy, negative, and disappointing day, she gets revitalized by her hatred of Limited Too, resolving to start buying things that represent our decrepit American consumer culture. Total spent: $1,227.48. Total returned: $1,189.26.

Episode 09

39:03 minutes (9.83 MB)

Rosemary is crabby again, but her efforts to expose the decay of American culture perk her up. After getting herself some well-needed new bras at Victoria’s Secret, she begins to explore the world of shallow materialism and bad taste. Birthday cake flavor spray at Le Gourmet Chef, a $110 Stella McCartney yoga mat at Paiva, and a gold lame bikini at Guess top the list for the day. Total spent: $776.18. Total returned: $511.96.

Episode 10

62:02 minutes (15.62 MB)

The third floor once again offers a potpourri of random experiences, with highlights at Nascar Motor Speedway and Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. When Rosemary stumbles on the Chapel of Love, she becomes lost in deep contemplation of Minnesota’s five day waiting period for a marriage license, and the ramifications of that on the Chapel's ability to compete with Las Vegas as a wedding venue. She finishes her day basking in the golden glow of the paintings at the Thomas Kinkade Gallery. Total spent: $607.44. Total returned: $517.58.

Episode 11

47:03 minutes (11.83 MB)

Rosemary is having a fat day, and doesn’t feel like trying anything on. After purchasing a bag of chocolates at Lindt, she decides to buy a handbag at every store to avoid encounters with the mirror. In reaction to her great experience at Thomas Kinkade Gallery the previous day, she also resolves to have a conversation with someone in each store. She fondles the most beautiful writing instrument she’s ever seen at Paradise Pen. Total spent: $806.95. Total returned: $791.77.

Episode 12

46:48 minutes (11.76 MB)

Sick of handbags, and lacking focus, Rosemary tries to buy something at each store which will improve the quality of life for her and her loved ones. Keene sandals at the Walking Store for Keith, a bug jar at the Rainforest Café for Garrett, and a totally hot pair of Lucky Brand Jeans for herself seem to fit the bill. At the end of her shopping, she finds herself halfway around the Mall. Total spent: 841.17. Total returned: 642.18.


Each podcast is an audio journal of the events of one shopping trip. A new episode is available every two weeks. Rosemary's sculpture, "The Wall of Mall," can be viewed here.

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